One of the Top Ten No-No's

In the first week of school last September the junior high principal was giving parents advise about their junior higher.. He said if your child says they finished their homework... ask them to show it to you.... If your child tells you a story about someone or something... don't always believe it... If they tell you about a new rule at school... call the office.. Kids this age are testing their boundaries.. they are seeing how far they can go... They are on the fence from being a little child climbing over to the scary world of adulthood... Their minds have a hard time grasping why us parents/adults don't treat them as equals... allowing them the same privileges that we have.
I have learned that I have to question things my child tells me... If it doesn't sound true or plausible it usually isn't true.. My daughter is trying to learn the art of "telling Mom what I think she wants to hear"......for those out there that really know me.... they know I wrote the book on that one... I was not a bad child... neither is my lovely daughter.... but I had the art of twisting the story till it benefited me down to an art.....that being said.. I usually can read my kid like a book.. thankfully... at least for the time being..
Today we were talking about how lies can affect people... How lies are so bad that God had made it one of the Top 10 big no- no's.... I asked Nikki why she lied and her answer reminded me of me at her age... She said that she lies because she knows if she asks I'll say no.. and she wants what she wants...She lies so she won't get a lecture from me about how she should have or should not have done something...She lies so she won't get in trouble for doing something she knows is wrong... She lies to make me proud of her.... She lies to have something to say..
I am not saying lying is right but her honest answers really made me think.... Knowing why she lies can only help her and me to create a safe environment for her to learn how to be more honest.. by making the right choices and maybe give me a moment to think about saying yes more often than no....
Going thorough the teenage years again with my daughter makes me appreciate the level of tolerance my mom had towards me.... being a teenage girl is tough..their minds are going in so many different directions and the emotions...don't get me started....
Listening to the Principal last September made me realize that lying is a part of growing up.... and that I'm not a bad parent because my kid is trying to master this skill.. I am rather a parent of a very normal child who wants to try impress me.. and make me proud.... and as a parent - I need to teach her that I am proud of her ALL the time... and am looking forward to the day when she has mastered the art of TRUTH...

Should We Lie To Be Politically Correct?

I have to give credit to Miss California, Carrie Prejean.... She stuck to her personal beliefs and answered a controversial question with her truths and her heart instead of being sucked into what is Politically Correct in today's society... here's the scoop in case you did not watch the Miss USA pageant on Sunday night.
Perez Hilton (a celebrity blogger) was a judge at the Miss USA Pageant. Why he would be a judge...I have no idea... I personally can't stand the guy... any hoo... He asked Miss California what her views were on same sex marriages and if every state should legalize gay marriage.... I am thinking her non PC answer shocked a few people...especially Perez.. Typically an answer in a pageant would be very non committal but Miss California respectfully answered the question...shows me that she can think on her feet..
Miss California responded, "Well, I think it's great that Americans are able to choose one or the other. We live in a land where you can choose same-sex marriage or opposite marriage. And you know what? In my country, in my family, I think that I believe that a marriage should be between a man and a woman. No offense to anybody out there, but that's how I was raised and that's how I think it should be, between a man and a woman. Thank you very much." After her honest answer - some audience members booed her... they booed... can you believe that?? This is another example how immature our society has become... to boo someone who truthfully answered a question... Who cares if you agree with her or not... I don't agree with same sex marriages but I would never boo someone that did.... Society needs to show respect to the person whether they agree or not...
Her honest non PC answer probably cost her the crown.... Miss California was first runner up in this pageant...To add insult to injury to Miss California, Keith Lewis an executive director for the pageants issued a statement to blogger Perez Hilton, condemning Miss California's remarks. He stated, "As co-executive director of Miss USA and one of the leaders of the Miss Family, I am personally saddened and hurt that Miss California believes marriage rights belongs only to a man and a woman. Although I believe all religions should be able to ordain what unions they see fit, I do not believe our government should be able to discriminate against anyone. Religious beliefs have no place in politics in the Miss Family."...kind of funny Miss California did not state her religious views...only her same sex marriage views.. I'm wondering if she said she preferred chocolate ice cream to vanilla... Mr. Lewis would send out a statement remarking how hurt he was that she did not like vanilla.....where does this PC stuff end?
What gets me is she answered a question.....what is she suppose to do?...Lie? If Keith Lewis and the Miss Family don't want religious beliefs or political beliefs in the pageants...then why don't they ensure that the judges don't ask politically charged questions.....
What are we to teach our children? To lie about their beliefs when asked a question because it might offend someone?? This is not about same sex marriages.. it's about saying what you believe... it's about respecting one another and our differences...and to you Mr. Hilton.....Don't ask a question...unless you can respect the answer.....and to Keith Lewis...shame on you.... and to Carrie Prejean, Miss California good for you to stand up for what you believe.....